Why didn't we learn about essential oils in school? I mean, that shit is ESSENTIAL. Should've been the first lesson!

Once upon a time there was a tractor enthusiast named Adam. Adam absolutely adored tractors, drove them around his field and on the roads when it was quiet. He owned a huge variety and would occasionally enter them in shows. One day, Adam was getting ready to take one of his most prized tractors to an exhibition. In preparation for this he decided to give it an almighty clean. As he was cleaning the exhaust however, something malfunctioned and the tractor covered Adam in exhaust fumes. Adam was …

A math teacher went to school drunk... He told the class that they were going to learn derivatives and then proceeded to pass out. He was removed from the school and fired immediately. The lesson? Don't drink and derive

What's a feminist's favourite school lesson? Triggernometry.