"David you're late again!" "Sorry boss.." [cut to: me running on all fours through a forest chasing deer] "...traffic"

Two Christians are lost in a desert David and Michael were going on a safari where they got lost and their car stopped working, they started wondering throughout the desert. With food and water supply almost ending and no reception anywhere they were desperately looking for help. After a very long time in the heat of the desert and almost dying from thirst they finally see a mosque far away. They start discussing among each other. David: I'll pretend I am a Muslim so they will give me food and w…

Powerball Money A very religious man, David, prays one day. He got down on his knees and said, ""God, please let me win the Powerball tonight. I'm out of a job and about to lose my car. Please help me."" The drawing comes, and David didn't win a thing. The next day of the drawing, he got down on his knees and said ""God, please let me win tonight. They've taken my car and I can't afford to feed my family; they're starving."" Again the drawing comes, and again David doesn't win. The next drawing,…

Translated Brazilian Joke - A broken car in the desert ** In Brazil it is common making jokes about our colonizers, the Portuguese. I hope they do the same about us in Portugal, so... ** A Portuguese, a Brazilian and an Argentinian are driving through the desert when their car suddenly breaks. Joao, the Brazilian suggests each one takes a piece of the car to help their journey walking back to the town. Santiago, the Argentinian says: - I'll take the seat, so if I'm tired I can sit on it and rest…