I don't understand why ISIS is such a big deal. All we have to do is parachute in Chuck Norris, and within a month they will all be dead... It can't be done faster since he fights with his bare hands.

A bullet hit chuck norris yesterday Today is the bullet's funeral

So archaeologists found another Dead Sea Scroll... They opened it up, and read: GENESIS 1:0 ""Before the beginning, there was Chuck Norris. And Chuck Norris said, 'Let there be God.'""

The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.