Tommy Cooper joke via David Sylvian out of Japan [From Guardian interview with David Sylvian](http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2012/mar/08/david-sylvian-gentlemen-polaroids-viagra?intcmp=ILCMUSTXT9387): > I like the old Tommy Cooper joke, the one that goes: Guy walks into a pet shop and says, ""I'd like to buy a wasp."" And the shop owner says, ""I'm sorry sir, but we don't carry wasps."" ""Well that's funny, there's one in the window.""

International relations The United Nations noticed that there was a lot of dissent among its ranks and relationships were strained. The UN leaders called a meeting and came up with a plan to increase morale that was discussed and agreed upon by all members. The plan was to take a representative from three different countries and place them on a deserted island for a year. They asked for volunteers. The representative from Greece stood up and shared how one of their own should be on the island be…

Apple Salesman A man has just moved from Japan to America and doesn't speak a word of English. He accepts a job as an apple salesman only because his boss is Japanese - American and speaks both English and Japanese. It's his first day on the job and he has his first customer, the customer asks ""How much are these apples?"" Not knowing what to say, he goes to his boss and asks what to say. His boss tells him to say ""Fifty cents! Fifty cents!"" So he returns to the customer and responds ""Fifty …

In his first trip to Japan, the businessman... ...is very nervous about meeting his wealthiest client, Mr. Nakagawa, whom he will be playing golf with the day after he arrives in the country. He takes a cab from the airport to his hotel and heads to the bar to drink his nerves away. Over the course of countless cups of sake, he meets a lovely young Japanese girl and ends up bringing her back to his room for a wild evening of fun. He wakes up the next morning, refreshed and full of confidence, …