-Houston, do you copy? -Houston, do you copy? -God damn it, Houston! -God damn it, Houston!

I like messing with Texas by calling random numbers in Houston and telling them I have a problem.

[tries to eject CD 5 mins into space mission] Houston we have a problem I KNOW U CHEATED W/MY WIFE TOM ENJOY 12 YRS OF SMASH MOUTH U PRICK

Just saw a snake slither through my backyard, so if anyone wants a house in Houston, it's yours.