[high seas] FIRST MATE: I can't wait to see my wife again PIRATE: Land Ho! FIRST MATE: Now look, that's a little rude

*goes to Australia *sees hot girl *asks if she wants to be my first mate *winks forever *gets punched down under

[high seas] FIRST MATE: The men be ready to attack PIRATE: Arr! FIRST MATE: Oh sorry...the men "are" ready to attack

A pirate ship is sailing across the Atlantic.. When suddenly the lookout shouts, ""Enemy ship heading our way!"" The captain, as soon as he hears this, tells his first mate to go grab his red coat. After they defeated the enemy, his first mate asks what the red coat was for. The captain responds, ""Whenever I go into battle with my crew, I don't want them to lose morale by seeing my blood stain me, so I wear this coat to hide my wounds from them."" The next day the lookout warns them, ""There's …