A man runs out of gas while driving through rural Iowa... His cell phone dead, he walks along the highway until he finds a farmhouse. He knocks on the door, and an old farmer offers to fuel up his car after they finish dinner, which he kindly invites him to. While enjoying his meatloaf and company of the farmer and his wife, the man looks out the window and sees a one-legged pig wriggling around in the mud like a earthworm. "Say if you don't mind me asking," says the traveller, "what's the s…

Me: Hi Kid: M: Still? It's been a week K: YOUR FIRST INSTINCT DURING A CAR ACCIDENT WAS TO PROTECT YOUR PHONE! M: You didn't die. Calm down.

Her; My phones dead let me use yours Me; (throws phone out car window) oh I must of left it at home

The longest joke in the world From: http://longestjokeintheworld.com/ So, there's a man crawling through the desert. He'd decided to try his SUV in a little bit of cross-country travel, had great fun zooming over the badlands and through the sand, got lost, hit a big rock, and then he couldn't get it started again. There were no cell phone towers anywhere near, so his cell phone was useless. He had no family, his parents had died a few years before in an auto accident, and his few friends had no…