Bran Muffins An old couple, he 85 years old and she 83, having been married almost 60 years, had died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to the wife's interest in health food and exercise. When they reached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter took them to their mansion, which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen, master bath suite, and Jacuzzi. As they gasped at the splendor of their estate, the old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. ""It's…

How to train your husband Three women are talking about how to train their husbands. The german woman says: I said to my husband ""Peter, I won't iron your shirts anymore!"" On the 1st day I couldn't see anything! On the 2nd day I couldn't see anything! On the 3rd day, lo and behold, he ironed his shirts by himself. The french woman says: I said to my husband ""Jean, I won't clean for you anymore!"" On the 1st day I couldn't see anything. On the 2nd day I couldn't see anything. On the 3rd day, l…

Three men in line to Heaven Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, ""Heaven's getting pretty close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what's your story?"" So the first man replies: ""Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my …

Peter and David were lost in the Sahara, hungry and thirsty ... When they found some men in their tents. Happy, they went to ask for food and shelter. An arab man asked them : what are your names? Peter replied Peter, but David, in fear, replied Mohamed. The arab man said: Well Peter, come with me i'll get you something to eat, and as you know Mohamed, it's ramadan, our holy month of fasting, you'll have to wait nine hours to eat, in the meantime you can sleep in my tent.