Three guys die and go to heaven... They are met at the Pearly Gates by, of course, St. Peter. ""Welcome welcome!"" he shouted as they approached ""It's so good to see you! Are you ready to enjoy your eternity in Heaven?"" ""Yes yes of course we are!"" all three guys shouted over top of each other. ""Great!"" says Peter. ""But before I let you in I need to go over a few things that have changed recently. Over the past few years we have seen an enormous increase in population and to deal with that…

Cloud Roulette Three men in a car get into a crash and wind up in front of Saint Peter himself. ""Ah, first vist of the day! Not that I wanted you to die..."" Saint Peter looks at a small clipboard and says, ""Names!"" All men respond with their full names. ""Okay then... What? That's odd... None of you are on the list! This is the second mixup this week! ""I'm so sorry for the inconvenience, let me ask God what I should do."" After a few minutes of Peter seemingly talking to God telepathically,…

Statistician joke An engineer, a physicist, and a statistician all die and go to heaven. When they arrive at the pearly gate St. Peter stops them and says before you pass through I have a simple question for each of you. He turns to the engineer and asks, ""What's 2 + 2""? The engineer pulls out his slide ruler, fumbles it around and says, ""3.9999"". St. Peter is fine with this answer and says, ""Come on in"". He then turns to the physicist and asks the same question, ""What's 2 + 2?"" The phys…

At the exact same moment, a priest named William Clinton and the former president William Clinton, die. Through a obvious mix up, Bill is sent to Heaven, while William is sent to Hell. They spent a day there, until the mistake is noticed and Bill is sent down to Hell. As they meet at the elevator, they meet an exchange pleasantries. ""After a day here, I feel sorry for you my son, but I am so excited to meet all my favorite Biblical figures! Jesus, Peter and of course, the Virgin Mary!"" William…