So Kim Kardashian's arse is huge and has a lot of oil I wonder if America will invade it? Oh wait, my bad, half of America already has

Kim Kardashian's butt Q: What do you call the space between Kim Kardashian's breasts and butt cheeks?  A: Silicon Valley.

How can you tell if your wife is being unfaithful? You move from Chicago to Seattle but still have the same mailman.

Papa Bear and Mama Bear are getting a divorce You know Goldilocks and the 3 bears? Well mama bear and papa bear are getting a divorce. In court they bring in baby bear. The judge puts baby bear on the stand and asks him who he'd like to live with? "Well not papa bear he beats me," says baby bear. "So mama bear?" asks the Judge. "Oh no she beats me even worse than papa bear," says baby bear. "So who would you like to live with?" the Judge asks curiously. "My grandma bear in Chicago." says b…