A small collection of my favorite science jokes A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “How much for a drink?” “For you, sir, no charge!”   What's 2 times 2? Physicist: “After some measurements I am fairly sure it is somewhere between 3.81 and 4.13!” Mathematician: “After some consideration I can now prove that the solution exists!” Engineer: “4, obviously, but lets make it 5, just to be on the safe side.”   Three logicians walk into a bar. “You all want a beer?” t…

Why is Mickey Mouse’s helicopter no use in Scotland? Disneyland

What is the difference between Scotland and a pregnant woman? A pregnant woman is in Labour

Scotland or Whales? I was having a couple of drinks in a London pub on a Saturday night. I noticed to very large women by the bar. They both had strong accents, so I asked, "Hey, are you two ladies from Scotland?" One of them turned to me and screamed, "It's Wales, you idiot!" So, I immediately apologized, and said, "Sorry, are you two whales from Scotland?"