Do you know why a vampire will never suck a lawyer's blood? Professional courtesy.

Crazy episode of Judge Judy on right now. This guy was a month late on his rent and she just gave him the electric chair.

Eating Doritos and watching Judge Judy in my underpants. Whoa! Dude! Why is Judge Judy in my house? And why is she wearing my underpants??

"You think only God can judge you?" *Judge Judy spins around in chair to face you* "Well THINK AGAIN!" *bangs gavel so hard it breaks*