What did the hurricane say to Hillary? I didn't know disasters can run for office

If President Trump passes away while in office, he will never admit it because... ...he'll continue tweeting denials about it from the grave: === --- >>###Yes, it is true - Tupac Shakur, the great Afro-American musician, called me about getting together for a meeting. We met, HE IS A GREAT GUY! >> Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 28, 2017 --- === --- >>###VERY dishonest coroner's report says I died. How crooked are they. Why did they only complain after Hillary lost?…

An angry Hillary storms into Satan's office and yells ""You told me I was going to win!"" Satan looks up from the paper and says, ""Well, you told me you had a soul.""

Presidential Race No one voted in the presidential election because everyone was so upset with the shit show. While trying to figure out what to do, Obama suggests an actual presidential race around the white house. They let bernie sanders run but since he's old he takes 24 mins. Trump goes and gets a time of 14:36. Hillary is all fired up and ready to beat trump. She is hopping over shrubbery and stepping on flowers. She finishes just under 10 mins. After she finishes, she proclaims, ""wow that…