Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty young woman said to the salesman: "I'd like this material for a dress. How much does it cost?" "Just one kiss per metre," grinned the smooth-talking salesman cheesily. "That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten metres." With anticipation written all over his face, the salesman quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it, and then teasingly held it out. The girl grabbed the package, pointed to the wizened old man standing next to her and smiled: "Grandpa here will pay the bill." A travelling salesman was trapped in his hotel in Washington State by torrential storms and floods. So he emailed his office in New York to say that he would be delayed by a few days. His boss emailed back: "Start vacation immediately."