Two Irishmen went into a bar in Scotland. One asked the bartender: "Is there any good fishing around here?" "Certainly," said the bartender. "The fish are thick in the water. You don't even need to put the rod in – you just reach in and pull them out! Big salmon! On your way home tonight, get your friend to hold you over the bridge by your legs and you can pull the salmon out of the water." The two agreed: "Yes, we'll try that when we get to the bridge." So on their way home they came to the bridge and one held the other upside down by his legs, waiting for the salmon. After three minutes, the guy who was hanging down suddenly shouted: "Quick! Pull me up!" His friend shouted back: "Have you caught a salmon?" "No – there's a train coming!"