Uncle Fred Jokes

My uncle Fred used to say "" What you can't hear can't harm you"" *used to* He was killed by ninjas.

It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So John heads back to the clubhouse and phones home. ""Hello?"" says a little girl's voice. ""Hi, honey, it's Daddy,"" says John. ""Is Mommy near the phone?"" ""No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Fred."" After a brief pause, John says, ""But you haven't got an Uncle Fred, honey!"" ""Yes, I …

It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a round of golf... It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So John heads back to the clubhouse and phones home. "Hello?" says a little girl's voice. "Hi, honey, it's Daddy," says John. "Is Mommy near the phone?" "No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Fred." After a brief …