Speedy Gonzalez Jokes

Where did they hang Speedy Gonzalez? At the pico de gallows.

What does Speedy Gonzalez keep under his carpet? Underlay! Underlay!

Collected Comments of College Students He teaches like Speedy Gonzalez on a caffeine high. Help! I've fallen asleep and I can't wake up! His blackboard technique puts Rembrandt to shame. Textbook is confusing ... someone with a knowledge of English should proofread it. This class was a religious experience for me ... I had to take it all on faith. The recitation instructor would make a good parking lot attendant. Tries to tell you where to go, but you can never understand him. Problem sets are a…

Betting Jokes Last night I got thrown out of the casino. As a sports bettor I completely misunderstood the crap table. ~ A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, “Suzan, pack up your things. I just won a ฿1000 20 leg parlay!” Suzan replies, “Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?” The man responds, “I don’t care. Just so long as you’re out of the house by noon!” ~ A bum asks a man for ฿0.002. The man says, “Will you buy booze?” The bum says, “No.” The man says, “Will you gamble it…