Ruth Jokes

A man and his dog walk into a bar... ...The man proclaims, "I'll bet you a round of drinks that my dog can talk." Bartender: "Yeah! Sure...go ahead." Man: "What covers a house?" Dog: "Roof!" Man: "How does sandpaper feel?" Dog: "Rough!" Man: "Who was the greatest ball player of all time?" Dog: "Ruth!" Man: "Pay up. I told you he could talk." The bartender, annoyed at this point, throws both of them out the door. Sitting on the sidewalk, the dog looks at the guy and says, "or is the gre…

A warlord was looking for some supplemental troops. He thought he found the most merciless and brutal mercenary company but their receptionist answered the phone... "My name is Ruth, how may I be of assistance today?"

Ruth, a young blonde woman, was driving her Ferrari waaay over the speed limit, …so she gets pulled over be the police. The police woman, who also turns out to be a young blonde, walks over to the Ferrari and signals Ruth to roll down her window. With the window open, our blonde police officer demands to see Ruth’s drivers license and registration. After finding the registration in the glove compartment, Ruth starts going through her purse looking for her drivers license. She gets exceedingly s…

The Supreme Court has been making some rash decisions lately… One could almost say they’ve been acting Ruth-lessly.

I broke up with my girlfriend Ruth..

I texted my girlfriend Ruth and told her it was over. I'm Ruthless.