I took a black shit I took a shit this afternoon. I took a look at it, and it was black! My shit had never come out that color before, and I had no idea what to do. So I did what I always do when I don't know what else to do: I called my father. I call him up at work. He picked up and I said, ""Hey Dad - you're not going to believe this, but I just took a shit and it's black!"" He responded back, ""Hey Bobby - you're not going to believe this, but I'm in a meeting, and you're on speaker phone!""…