Lenin headed directly to Paradise after he died He thought he had done a lot of good for the oppressed, so he deserved retirement in Paradise. He knocked on Heaven's door: ""Knock, knock!"" God shouted from his cosmically gigantic and perfectly spherical office: ""Who's there?"" ""Vladimir Ilyich Lenin."" ""Okay, okay! The last one in be sure to close the door. It's kind of cold in here..."" God studied carefully Lenin's dossier and decided to send him to the most suitable place: Hell. A short t…