Texting while driving: Bad. Wrestling a shark while driving: STILL LEGAL! WOOHOOO!!!

Saw a hawk swoop down over the highway and fly off with a snake in his mouth and I can't even switch lanes while eating a Twizzler.

Ghost cat: how'd you die? Ghost dog: i bit a guy that ran over my best pal and they put me down GC: i got hit by a car GD: I know GC: ilu

i argued with the parrot at the pet store until it got sold away and the guy who bought it wouldnt let me in his car. that means i won