The Pig Head!! So one day lucy wakes up and her husband (jake) tells her that he wants a good lunch keep in mind this is 9 am in the morning.So lucy says yes of course jake (husband).After breakfast she goes to the market where she starts to prep for lunch.She grabs some soda some garlic,carrot,green peppers etc..After that she heads to the butcher and ask if he can give her the biggest pig head he had so he goes and gets the biggest one he could find.Lucy then says are you sure this is the bigg…

First time posting here. I always found this f$%#ed up, but hilarious. Q: Why did Lucy fall off the monkey bars? A: She's got no arms Me: Knock Knock Them: Whose there? Me: Not Lucy.

A little old lady wants to buy a parrot. So she goes to the local pet store and asks the shopkeeper if he has any parrots. "Well I've just got this one right now but I have to warn you he used to belong to an old sailor and he's picked up some nasty words. Why don't you come back next week." He said. "No that's quite alright. I know just how to handle him." So she pays for the bird and brings him home and sure enough once he gets home he starts cussing up a storm so the old lady takes him a…

A LESSON IN MORALS One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher asks the class to go home and think of a story to be concluded with the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story. Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." When …