You know you have something special w someone when u start finishing their sentences. But enough about me & my local Subway sandwich artist

"Hey mom can Kyle come over?" mom: Kyle from your school or Kyle who is really bad at finishing other people's- [From outside] LOOFAS!

wife: im sick of him jeopardizing our marriage therapist: how do you respond to that kyle? me: ill take susan is being a huge baby for $600

[flash mob in front of me & my girl] [I join in then kneel down gasping] "Will you.." "YES!... YE.." "grab me a smoothie from Jamba Juice?"