My wife and I were walking down the street. My wife and I were walking down the street when she spotted the mayor of our town. ""You should go introduce yourself"" she said. I replied ""I have known him for years why should I?"" ""You do not know the mayor!"" she exclaimed. It was then that we walked up and talked to the mayor for 10 minutes. When we walked away she said I guess you did know the mayor. About a year later my wife and I were traveling through Washington D.C. and she said ""Wouldn'…

ME: [sitting on iphone] europe. europe. EUROPE. europe [5 hrs later] ME: ok fine maybe ur right WIFE: what did you think airplane mode meant

A wedding is like inviting your family and friends to the dock to watch you leave England on the Titanic.

My wife is from England so I gave her a good Rogering for Valentine's Day. He just left and she seemed to enjoy it, so... score?