I listen to gangsta rap sprinkled with a little Sarah McLachlan. Will I murder you? Will I adopt a puppy with you? You don't know.

Jesus Christ! I forgot to buy dog food last night and now my dogs are playing a Sarah McLachlan album and googling humane society.

Apostrophes are important. "I fed the dog" "I f'ed the dog" Learn this simple rule. Your friendship with Sarah McLachlan depends on it.

My dog keeps trying to get my attention but until he plays that Sarah McLachlan song I'm not gonna take him seriously.