Twilight werewolf Taylor Lautner turns 18 today. That makes him 126 in dog years so, unfortunately, we're going to have to put him to sleep.

I wish I had taught my dog the command ""Taylor Swift"" so every time it snowed he would just ""Shake It Off.""

Flea master There as a flea who hates his life. One day he goes to the flea master and says to him ""I am miserable, will you please put me somewhere where I am happy."" The flea master thinks and says, ""I have somewhere I can put you."" I will put you up on a horses hind, you'll really love it there."" So the master puts the flea up on the hind of the horse. The next day the flea calls the master again and says ""You have to get me out of here. This horse is killing me with his tail"" The mast…

My favorite joke my mom told me from my childhood. - A kindergarten teachers birthday. A kindergarten teacher is having her birthday and three of her students decided to bring her a gift. The first students was little Timmy and his dad owned a Candy Store. Timmy walked up to his teacher and handed her a nice little gift wrapped box. The teacher thanked the student and told him, she wanted to see if she could guess what was in the box. The little boy excitedly agreed and after about twenty second…