An oldie I heard in elementary school Little Johnny has just started kindergarten and doesn't know the alphabet. As things usually happen, the teacher asks Johnny to recite the alphabet. He tells her that he does not know the alphabet, so she tells him to go home and ask his parents to help him learn it. After school, he runs up the driveway and into the kitchen, where his mom is on the phone with a friend. As he runs in, he yells out ""MOM, WHAT'S THE ALPHABET?"" Being the wonderful mother that…

Don't ask... So one fine day, a young boy is listening to the radio. He has very bad reception so the radio is sort of static, nevertheless, he catches something about a purple donut. His curiosity sparked, he meanders over to his mother and said, ""Momma, what's a purple donut?"" She then gets this wild look in her eye an grabs a bat and begins to vigorously beat the boy. She yells, ""Get your ass to school, when you get home your going to the cellar!"" So he walks to school. He has a bloody no…

A woman walks into the Social Worker's office, trailed by 15 kids WOW, the social worker exclaims, Are they ALL yours? Yeah they're all mine, the flustered mother sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, Sit down Terry. All the children rush to find seats. Well, says the social worker, 'then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names. This one's my oldest - he is Terry. OK, and who's next? Well, this one he is Terry, also. The social worker raise…

A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom The teacher said yes. When he went to wipe his bum there was no toilet paper so he used his hands. When he got back to class his teacher asked, 'What do you have in your hand.'The boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away.'   He was then sent to the principals office and the principal asked him, 'What do you have in your hand.' So the little boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hand…