There was a man who said, ""I never knew what happiness was until I got married...and then it was too late!"" Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. They say when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage, it is self-defense. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going thr…

*getting married Priest: will you love & honor her? Me: I will Her: [whispers to priest] Priest: and leave your phone unlocked? Me: I'm out

wife: dont say anythin stupid on the way out me: i wont [shakes priest's hand after lovely wedding ceremony] me: so are you god's boyfriend?

My wife and I found each other on a dating website.........3 years after we got married. That was awkward.