Wife: why are you smiling? [realizing if Blue from Blue's Clues and Clifford had puppies they'd be purple] Me: I was thinking about you.

I can't take this show seriously until they address the size of Clifford the Big Red Dog's poops.

Shout out to Clifford the Big Red Dog. He coulda eaten those kids a long time ago

[on a date] me: what's your favorite book series about a big red dog? her: uhh Clifford, i guess me: wow we have a lot in common