what does the Bible say about faking your own death to get out of jury duty

*on death bed* priest: any regrets my child? *montage of every time i saw a large dog and didn't try to ride it* me: uhhhhh

God: make alcohol really fun Angel: haha ok God: but it makes them stupid Angel: i dont know if- God: and if they have too much they die

If I die, bury me with fire extinguishers. Because: Hell