Me: Can I leave early? Boss: Why? Me: Death Boss: Who died? Me: No one yet Boss: Me: Boss: Get out

Me: Want some of my nachos? Coworker: I don't like nachos. Me: Hello 911, what's consider premeditated murder?

Die Hard (1988) A shoeless New Yorker murders a bunch of people at his wife's office Christmas party.

I just know my cause of death will be trying to scoot my office chair around as fast as possible.