A World War II Pun A German child was playing outside. Eventully, he was so exhausted that he went inside and asked his mother for a drink. She brings him a cup of water. After a sip, he asks ""Mother, why can't I have something sweeter?"" She replies, ""I couldn't give you anything else because our Fuhrer does not want us to have juice in our house."" Edit: If that didn't work so well for you try this revised one. Hitler was going to breakfast with his advisors. After they ordered, the waiter c…

The best situation set-up I've ever heard in real life.. My army platoon was training a decade ago when this happened, I still laugh about it today. I'll not use names, just ranks. We had just finished a mission and field maintenance and had about an hour of down-time before our next briefing, so the whole platoon was in a tent sitting on cots in a circle just bullshitting. One of the sergeants, a particularly vulgar guy, starts telling some nasty and offensive jokes which starts the whole pl…

A World War II Pun A German child was playing outside. Eventully, he was so exhausted that he went inside and asked his mother for a drink. She brings him a cup of water. After a sip, he asks "Mother, why can't I have something sweeter?" She replies, "I couldn't give you anything else because our Führer does not want us to have juice in our house." Edit: If that didn't work so well for you try this revised one. Hitler was going to breakfast with his advisors. After they ordered, the waiter ca…

When I was a kid growing up in the Cold War, I had nightmares about the Russians. They wrote long novels. And professors made me read them.