Thursday is that guy who shows up early for the party, with margarita mix and no booze.

A cowboy walks into a bar, a few miles West of Brokeback Mountain, and, after two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. 'What the hell,' he says to himself, 'I really want a drink.' When the bartender approaches, he says to the cowboy, 'What's the name of your 'willy'?' The cowboy says, 'Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink.' The bartender says, 'I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your 'willy'. Mine for instance is called NIKE, for the slogan 'Just Do …

I was drinking a margarita when a guy stood up and asked, ""Does anyone here know CPR?"" Someone else stood up and said, ""Yeah, I know the whole alphabet."" We all laughed and laughed and laughed... well, except this one guy.

What's the difference between a man and a margarita? A margarita hits the spot every time!