PATIENT: How tough was medical school for a dog like you? DR DOG: *thinking back on all the homework he ate* It wasn't easy

DR DOG: *gives kid patient a sucker* MOM: what do u say KID: thanks mr dog DD: kid I didnt go to med school for 56 years to be called Mr Dog

NURSE: The other nurses and I bought you this box of chocolates for Valentines Day! DR DOG: You're joking, right?

[During surgery] DR DOG: Suction please. NURSE: But there's no bleeding. DR DOG: I know *drooling* but just look at that liver!