Roger the Living Head [Story Joke] So there's this newly married couple, and they love each other quite a bit. So they decide they're going to have a child. Nine months goes by and it's time for the child to be delivered, but when the doctors pull the baby out, it is only a head. It's still crying and healthy, but it has no body besides its head. The doctors are amazed, but the parents are heartbroken. They decide that they are going to name the baby Roger after his father's father, and that they are going to give Roger the life he would have had anyway, and that they would never short Roger on anything a normal kid would experience. Years go by. Roger matures into an adolescent head and becomes popular in his high school. He's known around town as a real stand-up guy (though they would never tell him that for fear of offending him with the colloquialism). He doesn't lie, cheat, steal, or even cuss. He's the star of the school basketball team (he really seemed to understand the concept of ""Be the ball"" better than any of the other kids), he's president of the Student Government Association, and he's the valedictorian of his graduating class. A few more years pass, and it's Roger's 21st birthday. His father decided that he was going to take Roger out to a bar to have his first drink with him. When they arrive at the bar, the bartender asks what he can get them, and the father says ""Let's have a shot of the strongest stuff you've got for my son, who has just turned 21!"" The bartender grabs a shot glass and pours several different types of liquor into the glass, mixing it, and finally lighting it on fire. The father takes the glass and puts it to Roger's mouth, allowing him to drink. Roger gulps down the shot, and suddenly he grows a torso! The formerly noisy bar quiets down and people begin to stare. Roger's father turns to the bartender enthusiastically and demands another shot. The bartender seems reluctant, but he obliges and serves up another one. The father helps Roger gulp another shot down and Roger sprouts arms! By this point, everyone in the bar had gathered around and started chanting for the bartender to give Roger another shot. The father says ""What are you waiting for, man! Give us another!"" The bartender says ""I don't know... I don't think that's a good idea..."" Eventually, however, he cedes to the pressure of the crowd and concocts another shot. This time Roger himself grabs the glass up and downs it in a second. Lo and behold, he sprouts legs! Everyone cheers loudly as Roger stands up for the first time. Roger begins dancing and decides that he wants to go outside-- so Roger runs out into the street and gets hit by a truck and is killed instantly... ...everyone somberly walks back inside the bar, and the silence hangs thick like a wheel of blue cheese. The father's sobs can be heard above all else, when the bartender shakes his head and says to the man, ""I tried to warn you... he should have quit while he was a head!""