Fart Soccer An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the man passes gas and says, ""1-0"". His wife rolls over and says, ""What in the world was that?"" The old man replied ""it's fart soccer."" A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, ""Goal! Tie score..."" After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, ""Aha, I'm ahead 2 to 1"" Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, ""And she scores again!, tie score."" Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, ""BinGOAL, I lead 2 to 3."" Now the pressure is on for the old man. He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally shits in the bed. The wife says, ""What the hell was that?"" The old man says, ""Half time, switch sides.""