Three guys are walking up a mountain Legend had it that if you made a wish and jumped off, your wish would instantly come true. The first man goes to the edge and says ""I wish to be a fish"" He jumps off, turns into a fish, and swims away in the river below. The second man goes to the edge and says ""I wish to be a hawk"" He jumps off, turns into a hawk and flies away. The third man, being a little nervous, inches his way to the edge and says ""I...I wish"" and right then he slips and yells ""S…

Workers and Cats Four men were bragging about how smart their cats are. The first man was an engineer, the second man was an accountant, the third man was a chemist and the fourth man was a government worker. To show off, the engineer called his cat, ""T-square, do your stuff."" T-square pranced over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.. But the accountant said his cat could do better. He called his …

Three men walk into a party. The first man beelines toward a table with a bowl of punch. The second man closely follows. A few people are ahead of them so while they wait the first man turns to the second man and asks: ""Have you ever heard the one about the garden gnome?"" The second man replies ""No, not that I can recall..."" The first man begins ""Well you see, a garden gnome, a snake, and a raven walk into a bar."" The second man interrupts ""Snakes don't walk! They slither."" The first man…

Gary and the Parrot. Gary owns a pet shop. One day a customer by the name Stacy walks in and is looking around and fancies a parrot. Looking at this Gary says, that the parrot can talk fluently. Stacy: What do you think about me dear parrot? Parrot: Stacy, You are one big Slut. Stacy and Gary are shocked. Gary takes the parrot to the back of the shop and finds a big bucket of water and dunks the parrot in it. Gary: Are you going to talking trash? Parrot: Of Course Gary. Again parrot is dunked in…