Jason came home from the pub late one Friday evening... ... stinking drunk (as he often did) and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep. He gave his wife a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. ""Who the hell are you?"" Demanded Jason, ""and what are you doing in my bedroom?"". The mysterious Man answered ""This isn't your bedroom and I'm St. Peter"". Jason was stunned ""You mean I'…

Joe the drunk Joe gets home drunk and falls into bed next to his wife. As he falls asleep he feels himself rise up out of his body and floats up to heaven. Joe gets to the pearly gates confused and asks St. Peter, ""Am I dead?"" ""Yes Joe, but because of the way you lived your life, you will have to be reincarnated as a chicken!"" Before Joe can protest he disappears with a loud poof, and finds himself on a farmyard filled with hens. The hens welcome the new hen arrival, pecking and clucking all…

Drunken reincarnation James, as usual, came home really late one Saturday night after being at the bar all night drinking. Not only was he drunk, he was sloppy drunk. He carefully crept into bed next his wife, who fell sleep angry hours earlier, and gave her a goodnight kiss on the check in hopes that she wouldn't wake up. He awoke in the middle of the night to a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. ""Who the hell are you,"" demanded James, ""and what are…

Life's Demerit System All married men will attest to some real wisdom in this message. In the world of romance, one single rule applies: MAKE THE WOMAN HAPPY! Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a non-exhaustive guide to the point system: SIMPLE DUTIES You make the bed. (+1) You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillows. (…