Chris Evans: ""Excuse me, is this London?"" Passerby: ""Yes""... We used to drive around in a transit van. One time we were playing in London and we pulled up on Edgware Road and Chris Evans - wound down the window and said, ""Excuse, mate?"" ""Yeah?"" said a passer-by. ""Is this London?"" he said There was silence. ""Yes"" said the passer-by. ""Well, where do you want this wood?"" said the driver (from Out of the Ordinary, Jon Ronson)

There was a tourist in Dublin. He was trying to get to London but was running a little short on time. He sees an elderly man sitting on a bench and thought the man might know a quicker way to get there. He approached the man and asked ""Sir, what is the fastest way to London?"" ""Are you walking, traveling by push bike, or motor vehicle?"" the elderly man asked. ""Well, car. I'll be traveling by car."" the tourist replied curiously. ""Well that's the fastest way I know.""

The Glue Truck A truck owned by a commercial glue company is driving through London when it accidentally collides with a lamp post, causing it to swerve out of control and flip on its side. During this collision, the tank holding the glue explodes and 1000kg of glue falls upon a poor pedestrian. He's firmly stuck to the road. A crowd gathers around the helpless pedestrian, all wanting a look at the man and thinking about how to help him, although he's in a sticky situation that looks quite inesc…

I ran an ice cream shop near the Thames in London... We had great business because we were stationed right outside Scotland Yard headquarters. In fact, we were so well-known that we were actually picked from all other shops in London to host Britain's first-annual Ice Cream Seller's contest. Over a thousand people turned up, and they actually had to cordon off part of the Thames with a buoyed police rope due to the traffic we were generating! The events ranged from Fastest Scoop to Best Waffle C…