I predict that Obama's next move is to threaten to hold his breath until Russia leaves the Crimea.

A Russian, a French and a German tourist walk through New Guinea... ...when, suddenly, a cannibal tribe emerges from the jungle and attacks them. They're caught and brought to the village, where the tribe's chief walks out. ""Ah,"" he says, ""nice to meet you! Now, we'll eat you, of course, that's our tradition, but it's nothing personal, I don't want you to think of us badly. So, you'll all get one wish before we begin."" The Frenchman looks around and says ""Well, if I have to die, let me spen…

The rulers of the US, Russia, and China walk into a random bar in Latin America What do the locals call them? El negro, el gringo y el chino.

Why are people so sore about Russia taking the Crimea? I mean cry me a river river right?