That moment when you're driving and tweeting and you look up and notice you're in the Atlantic Ocean.

Portuguese man finds magic lamp A Portuguese man walking down the beach stumbles upon a rusty and dirty old lamp. Intrigued, he picks it up and rubs it trying to read the old etchings on the side, and out comes a genie! The genie says: ""You have released me, and for that I will grant you one wish!"" (hey, it's a Portuguese genie, we get shafted all the time, so we only get one wish instead of three) The man thinks for a bit and responds: ""I'd like a highway that connects us all the way to Amer…

THE best Bavarian cream pie My grandpa was stationed in Germany after the war. And when I was very small he told me about this little restaurant that served THE best Bavarian cream pie. Apparently he went there every opportunity he had. He couldn't get enough of that Bavarian cream pie - it was absolutely unreal. Well, a few years ago, my grandpa found out that he had a terminal illness, and only had a few months left to live. So, he booked a deluxe vacation cruise to Europe that would eventuall…

SOMEONE LEFT THEIR DOGS IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP -Ma'am, that's a pack of Ballpark All-Beef Franks. ITS 500 DEGREES IN THERE