Mechanic: what seems to be the problem? Me: nice try buddy, that's what I'm paying you for

Have you ever heard someone honking so aggressively & for so long that you're like "this was never about the traffic, was it, buddy?"

*sees a car with a "how am i driving" bumper sticker* *calls the phone number* ME: buddy i think it's with a steering wheel

A Loving Grandpa A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved 3 year-old grandson. It's obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle; and for fruit, cereal and soda in the other aisles. Meanwhile, Grandad is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, ""Easy, William, we won't be long, easy, boy."" Another outburst, and she hears the granddad calmly say, ""It's okay, William, j…