""I already know Russian"" A KGB officer is walking in the park and he sees and old Jewish man reading a book. The KGB says ""What are you reading old man?"" The old man says ""I am trying to teach myself Hebrew."" KGB says ""Why are you trying to learn Hebrew? It takes years to get a visa for Israel. You would die before the paperwork got done."" ""I am learning Hebrew so that when I die and go to Heaven I will be able to speak to Abraham and Moses. Hebrew is the language they speak in Heaven."…

""Telling jokes about the KGB was thought to be like pulling the tail of a tiger..."" A frightened man came to the KGB ""My talking parrot disappeared."" ""This is not our case. Go to the criminal police."" ""Excuse me. Of course I know that I have to go to them. I am here just to tell you officially that I disagree with that parrot."" More Russian political jokes here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_political_jokes

One day, Stalin loses his pipe. He calls his secret police chief, Beria, and orders him to find it. A few hours later, Stalin finds his pipe and calls Beria to cancel the investigation. Beria tells Stalin that they have arrested 100 people and 99 of them have already confessed. Stalin responds, "Only 99? Then continue the investigation."

> विज्ञान के टीचर ने छात्रों से पूछा Aloevera क्या होता है?छात्र- सर पंजाब मैं जब छोटा भाई बड़े भाई को ‘लस्सी’ का गिलास बनाकर देता है तो कहता है..’ए लो वीरा’ !छात्र का जवाब पढ़कर मास्टर जी ने अपना सिर पीट लिया. > डॉक्टर- कैसे हो? शराब पीना बंद किया या नहीं?मरीज- जी डॉक्टर साहब, बिल्कुल छोड़ दिया है, बस कोई ज्यादा रिक्वेस्ट करता है तो पी लेता हूं.डॉक्टर- बहुत बढ़िया...और यह तुम्हारे साथ कौन भाई साहब हैं?मरीज- जी इनको रिक्वेस्ट करने के लिए रखा हुआ है! >लड़की- बताओ जब…