What Not to Say to a Policeman -- I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. -- Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize I was driving. -- Wow, you must've been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! -- I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead. -- You're not gonna check the trunk, are you? -- You look just like my girlfriend's deadbeat ex-husband. -- The question is -- do YOU know why you pulled me over? -- I was trying to keep up with traffic, and it's miles …

My wife saw her ex high school boyfriend, drunk in the street. She said he started drinking when she broke up with him after graduation decades ago. I said.... ....Impressive. .. I've never seen anyone celebrate that long before.

My wife saw her ex high school boyfriend drunk in the street. She said he started drinking when she broke up with him after graduation decades ago. I said....

My Wife and I Were Sitting at a Table At her high school reunion, when she kept staring at a drunken man swigging a beer as he sat at a nearby table. I asked her "Do you know him?" "Yes" she sighed. "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago & he hasn't been sober since. "WOW" I said. "Who would think a person could go on celebrating for so long?!?" And that's when the fight started....