No arms, no legs. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pothole? Phil. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a wall? Art. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in front of a door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs that you lift? Jim. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs acting as a buoy? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being peed on? John. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs covered in mustard? …

"Is Phil coming tonight?" "Phil Smith or Phil that has the eyesight of a bird?" *suddenly a man runs face first into the sliding glass door*

[meeting] Bill: we'll call it BILLOSOPHY Phil [pulling out briefcase and assembling gun]: Good idea! Steal my board idea now this? Not again

*walks into interview* Thanks for coming in today. I'm Mr. Maballsonya, but please call me Phil. *walks out of interview*