The Engineer Towards the end of the French revolution many people lost their heads to the guillotine. One day a politician, a priest, and an engineer were to be executed. The politician was first. The executioner asked him: ""Do you have any last words?"" to which the man replied, ""I regret nothing."" The executioner lowered the man's head into the guillotine and released the blade. It fell swiftly but suddenly jams and stopped just inches from reaching the politician's neck. There was a rule w…

An engineer in Hell An engineer dies and goes up to the Pearly Gates where St. Peter greets him. ""Come in, come in."" says Peter, ""We can always use another engineer."" But the engineer is not so sure he wants to go to Heaven. He is a builder and a doer and is afraid he will be bored. So he asks if he can have a look at Hell to see if he would like to go there instead. St. Peter says ""Sure, why not?"" and sends him down for a look. The engineer sees the fiery pits and the swamps and the heat …

Three guys are about to be executed. One's a lawyer, one's a priest, and one's an engineer. They bring out the lawyer first, put him under the guillotine, and pull the lever, but the blade gets stuck halfway down. The lawyer goes, ""Ah-ha! By pulling the lever, you have technically carried out the execution, which according to the sentence you can only do once. Trying again would constitute double jeopardy, which is unconstitutional. You have to let me go."" Intimidated by this, the executioner …

Engineer in Hell An engineer dies and goes to hell. After a while, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in there and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, hell has air conditioning, flushing toilets, water fountains and escalators - making the engineer a pretty popular guy. One day God phones Satan up and asks with a sneer: ""Hey buddy, how's it goin down there in hell?"" Satan snickered back, ""Things are going great actually. We've got air conditioning,…