I heard a great dad joke in the emergency room the other day at work. So the nurse and I walk into the room and there's a nice middle aged gentleman He seemed nervous so the nurse asked what the matter was: ""well did you hear about the guy that died at this hospital last week?"" *Nurse and I glance at each other nervously ""No? well he had to be rushed to emergency surgery the moment he showed up!"" *More nervous glances ""Well when they sewed him up they left a sponge in him by accident"" ""....and he died of thirst the next day"" *cue peevish laughter from ultimate dad.