At the beach (When I was growing up, my father used to tell this joke at every thanksgiving gathering of friends and family. I was mortified each time. Now it's one of those memories that makes me smile, regardless of the joke quality...) Me and my buddy were out along the beach one weekend looking for clams. We had a nice spot picked out for a bake later in the evening. But as it started to get dark, we had to head back, with no clams at all. On the way, we saw a food vendor set up in the sand,…

Son of a Beach So I like digging. I am going to go the beach and become a professional digger. Professional digger.

A police officer sitting in his car on coffee break see's a car full of penguins drive by... He throw's his cruiser in gear, calls it in on the radio and immediately pulls the penguin stuffed vehicle over. He walks up to the drivers side door, and being far too curious for formalities and protocol bluntly asks: "What in the hell do you think your doing driving aroud with all these damn penguins?? The driver, clearly nervous and confused began to stammer: " Well i, i just...." but the officer im…