A Beautiful Day for a Parachute Jump A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. He pulls the rip cord and nothing happens.....pulls the reserve and nothing... as the earth rapidly approaches he decides that he might as well enjoy the view on the way down. The wind is ripping past his face, he's dropping like a rock, and at 5000 feet, another man goes shooting up past him. In desperation, the man with the chute looks up and yells, ""Hey do you know anything about parachutes?!"" The guy flying up looks down and yells, ""No!, do you know anything about gas ovens?!""