The generals' stroll Two generals are walking through a military base when they notice a pile of dog shit in front of them. They stop, examining it ponderously and begin to debate. The debate stretches on and on until the taller and thinner of the two calls out to a nearby soldier: ""I say, private! Tell us what this looks like to you."" The private is confused but knows better than to ask and simply replies: ""Looks like dog shit, sir."" This sets the general's debate into motion again and they argue with renewed vigour until the fatter general turns to the private and asks: ""Private, what does this smell like to you?"" The private, knowing better than to ignore a general's question, leans over and tries to keep his nose from wrinkling as he inhales deeply over the steaming pile of excrement. ""Smells like dog shit, sir."" This sets the generals off once again, and the fat general begins to gesticulate while the thin one simply stands and shakes his head. The private sees which way this is going for him and tries to slip away while the generals are in particularly heated debate, but before he can he hears the thin general's voice. ""One more thing, private. Taste it for us and tell us what you think."" Well, no escaping it now, thinks the private, and as he gets down on all fours to approach the turd he repeats to himself over and over that it's either this small discomfort or the end of his military career. With his eyes closed and sphincter clenched, he licks the shit and barely avoids vomiting. But he gets up and reports: ""Tastes like dog shit, sir."" ""I see,"" replies the thin general, ""so it looks like dog shit, smells like dog shit..."" ""Tastes like dog shit too!"" interjects the fat general. ""Yes, yes, tastes like dog shit. So I guess... it *is* dog shit"" ""Huh,"" replies the other, ""Good thing we didn't step in it.""